Trunk Monkey

Have you seen any of the ads at http://www.trunkmonkeyad.com/?

I see...trouble comin'

Shortly after this picture was taken, my son bloodied my beezer because I didn't have any matches. Can any of you parents out there offer me some counsel?

High Jumping

Did you know that it is possible for a high jumper's body to pass over the bar, while his center of gravity passes under it?

Compatibilism

Theological compatibilism is a label which lacks explanatory value. Like the Big Bang.

Accomplishment

Rejoice with me, one and all!

My eldest daughter has, as she put it, "won" her driver license.

Bugs and Such

A wasp rode on the outside of my windshield this morning the eight miles from my home to my office. It was above the steering wheel at eye level. As I drove off, I wondered how long the wasp would stay on. I wondered if it would be able to find its way back home when it did fall off. Or, that failing, whether it would be able to take up with some other wasps in the vicinity of its abandoning my vehicle. Or would it wander homeless, alone and destitute, and die before its time.

I watched the wasp as I eased down my driveway. It didn't move much. When it did move, its legs moved in a jerky fashion. The right rear leg massaged the right wing. I wondered why. As I turned onto the road and began to pick up speed, the wasp was facing up the windshield with its back to the wind. Its wings caught the wind and fluttered into a vertical position. I thought the wasp would be swept off. But it wasn't. It slowly, jointily, eased around to a head down and facing the wind position. Its wings were streamlined against its body. How did it know to do this? I thought about turning on the windshield wipers to see how the wasp would fare. But I thought better of it. I was impressed that it could handle 50 mph.

As I slowed to a stop at a red light, the wasp rotated around, taking a tentative step or two. But as I picked up speed after the light turned green, the wasp returned to its wind resistance minimizing posture. That wasp really seemed to want to stay on the windshield. I would have liked to examine the ends of its legs to see, perhaps, what enabled it to cling to a smooth glass windshield.

As I pulled into a parking space in the Queen Street lot up the hill from my office, the wasp still adhered to the windshield. I wonder if it will be there this afternoon....

Statistics

There's a statistic circulating to the effect that 80% of children who grow up in a Christian family abandon their faith after they graduate high school. When I asked my children which eight or nine of them were the 80%, my seven-year old daughter said, "I'm not going to graduate."

Sinning and repenting

"With the conviction in the church and ministry so ripe, settled and universal, that the utmost that the grace of God can do for men in this world is to bring them to repentance, and to leave them to live and die in a state of sinning and repenting, is it at all wonderful, that the state of religion should be as it really has been?"

- Charles Finney

Sanctification

“Full provision is made for overcoming the three great enemies of our souls, the world, the flesh, and the devil.

1. The world—“ESV 1 John 5:4 For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world- our faith. 5 Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?

2. The flesh—“ESV Galatians 5:16 But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.

3. Satan—“ESV Ephesians 6:16 In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one;

--Charles Finney

Graduation song

Here is a song I wrote for the occasion of a surprise graduation party for William Ross Blackburn, a friend who received his doctoral degree from St. Andrews this summer:

Graduation Song of William R. Blackburn
(Sung to the tune of “Jock McGraw”)


Behold, my name is Rossie B.,
My favorite foods are haggis and tea;
The finest place I ever hae been
Is South Bowhill near quaint Peat Inn.

Now, Scotland is a land of pheasant and sheep,
Of heathery hills and craigies steep;
And the Blackburn name has the ring of a Scot,
But when I waggle my tongue, folks know I’m not.

Chorus:

Supervisors come, and Examiners go,
Learnin’ foreign tongues is a breeze, heigh-ho!
And now I’ve completed, with very little fuss,
“The Missionary He’rt o’ the Exodus”.


I thocht I’d bide but a year or twa,
When I told my wife, all she said was “Ah.”
To hersel’ she’d say, “he’ll spend his days,
Turnin’ gray in college at old St. A.’s.

I mused by day, and I dreamed by night,
And I filled my mind with a noble sight
Of lights, on a stage, and a thunderous clap--
It was Ross in a robe and St. Andy’s cap.

Chorus:


I recall a day with great chagrin,
When my thesis was three-quarters din.
It was digitally stored on a wee PC,
And a blackguard thief pinched the goods frae me.

But a friend—Ah yes!—had a backup disk,
And although we knew we’d run a risk,
He sent it by post o’er the Sea to the States,
And my thanks resounded in the city gates.

Chorus:

Our lads would assemble from near and far,
Each week at the pub for the Seminar;
I praised in song the Canonical Approach,
To impress Chris Seitz, my Divinity Coach.

But Wenham and MacDonald both looked askance,
And scorned to join my exegetical dance;
In the end they changed their Scholarly tune,
And gave me the nod in the month of June.

Chorus: